I expected to be exhausted, struggling to find the time for a shower and unconditionally in love with my baby, what no one told me is that I would have a resentment to some of the new things in my life, or that by the time my son is 5-6 weeks old he should now be feeding from both breasts at a feed.
I am struggling to accept the fact that I have a minor resentment towards my partner. It's not really towards him as such but the fact that he gets to sleep through the night and not get up. Everywhere tells you to share the load, "get your partner to help with nighttime feedings". What they don't tell you is that unless your partner is also a lactating female or you are formula feeding there is no way that they can help with feeding. My son does not do man boobs. I would love right now to not be up at 3am feeding a baby who half an hour ago indicated he was done and waited until I had put him in his cot to make it known that he was hungry again.
I know that I am slightly crazy in being up at 3am blogging and not sleeping as my baby is now asleep in my lap and not making the I'm hungry signs. But sometimes frustrations need to be released before one can fully get good sleep no matter how short it may be. Plus there is every likelihood that my partner will make the usual irritated grunts and roll over away from me when I finally crawl into bed.
Oh and to you new mothers, don't feel guilty when you let your baby cry as you make some toast for breakfast or get some lunch, they will get over it but you need food too and just once in a while your needs come first. I thought you should know this from me as I gave up on feeling guilty a couple of weeks ago when I realised that despite people telling you to eat healthy and have 3 meals a day plus snacks it just doesn't fit into my baby's schedule. That is unless I let him cry a little while I make something to eat. Food that you can eat one handed while supporting your baby at the breast is easiest.
I am struggling to accept the fact that I have a minor resentment towards my partner. It's not really towards him as such but the fact that he gets to sleep through the night and not get up. Everywhere tells you to share the load, "get your partner to help with nighttime feedings". What they don't tell you is that unless your partner is also a lactating female or you are formula feeding there is no way that they can help with feeding. My son does not do man boobs. I would love right now to not be up at 3am feeding a baby who half an hour ago indicated he was done and waited until I had put him in his cot to make it known that he was hungry again.
I know that I am slightly crazy in being up at 3am blogging and not sleeping as my baby is now asleep in my lap and not making the I'm hungry signs. But sometimes frustrations need to be released before one can fully get good sleep no matter how short it may be. Plus there is every likelihood that my partner will make the usual irritated grunts and roll over away from me when I finally crawl into bed.
Oh and to you new mothers, don't feel guilty when you let your baby cry as you make some toast for breakfast or get some lunch, they will get over it but you need food too and just once in a while your needs come first. I thought you should know this from me as I gave up on feeling guilty a couple of weeks ago when I realised that despite people telling you to eat healthy and have 3 meals a day plus snacks it just doesn't fit into my baby's schedule. That is unless I let him cry a little while I make something to eat. Food that you can eat one handed while supporting your baby at the breast is easiest.
